Happiness

A friend of mine posted on facebook last week, asking when it is too late to risk undergoing a career change.  I’m glad that many others chimed in to tell her that it’s never too late, and that doing what is REALLY going to make you happy is worth it, and that you can find ways to make these career adjustments work.  The scariest part is admitting that you want a change.  The other stuff is doable.

It’s been almost a year since playwright Tom Poole died.  It’s unfortunate to think that it takes losing great people to remember how to live life better.  But, Tom was a reminder for many of us.  In fact, Tom’s death happened in the midst of a period of time where I realized that I did not like the way that I was living life– that I was overrun by anxiety, spread too thin, and unable to remember what I really liked.  In fact, Tom defined happiness in such a beautiful way– a way that really did explain to me why I was having a hard time finding it:  My experience of happiness is that it just comes to you. It is not so much the product of things you like happening to you as it is a feeling of yourself in the world.

I’m happy to report that, a year later, I like the feeling of myself in the world a lot more.  And, I’m grateful that I feel much more aware of life’s possibility– that if I want to make something happen, I truly can.  I guess what I’m trying to articulate is this: If you wake up one morning (or many mornings), unsure if you like the life you’re living, change it.  It’s totally possible.  I think that for a long time I thought that life was supposed to be Really. Hard. Work.  And, I guess it is– creating the life you want to live IS really freaking hard– BUT I don’t think it’s supposed to be hard in the I’m-chronically-anxious-and-over extended-and-can’t-remember-my-name-for-months kind of way.  I thought it was, but it turns out that it was just me, making things harder for myself than they ever needed to be.

So, yeah.  It’s a process, but it feels possible.  And, that’s really exciting.  And, on that note, I’m going off grid for a while, and will return June 4.  JUNE!  JUNE?  Yes.

 

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